Saturday, May 9, 2009

Silent Screams

Screaming out in silence as this way of life--
Just above existing--
Begins closing in around me.
Conforming to someone else's rules,
doing nothing more than I am told,
Eats away at my soul and I struggle to break free.
Feelings I can't express, people I shouldn't see--
Who's in charge here, anyway?
Isn't this my life?
Can't I make mistakes, claim them as my own
and go on from there, picking up the pieces of my dreams?
There must be more to life than silent screams.
© 1982 TDD

Perfect.....Or Not

Meeting him was an unexpected pleasure--I never imagined it would happen this way.
When I thought of falling hopelessly in love, I had always dreamed of finding Prince Charming.
I pictured a man who was tall, dark and handsome--
and of course it wouldn't hurt if he had money to burn.
My life was spent chasing after men who fit the bill,
and chasing away the ones who just weren't quite right.
Then one day I saw him from across a room--
tall and dark, not exactly handsome.
Should I risk it?
When he smiled and spoke, there was something in his eyes
which seemed to draw me closer to him.
The man I found is clever, witty, charming, romantic,
unpredictable, incorrigible, stubborn,
and poor as a church mouse but, most important of all,
He accepts the not-so-perfect me.
© 1982 TDD

You, Me and Her

You, Me and Her
She came back into town today and you went racing to her side,
leaving me home alone again.
I thought you had gotten over her and your love for me was strong,
But now I see she's still got a hold over you that will never be broken until she is ready.
Any time she snaps her lovely fingers you'll be there before the echo dies away.
When she walks away from you again, the way she has so many times before,
You'll come crawling back home, expecting me to be there waiting,
knowing I could never leave you.
I'll welcome you back with open arms and give you all the love it takes to heal your wounds
Until she comes back once more.
© 1982 TDD

WIthout You

Facing the future without you--even the thought can bring tears to my eyes.
How can I live the rest of my life without the man who is the answer to my prayers?
Once I took our relationship for granted, feeling it was something I could either take or leave.
Now I see you've become so much more to me than I ever thought possible for any man in my life.
If I were to lose you now, after all we've been through, I know I could never bring myself to love again,
For my heart will always belong to you.
© 1982 TDD


You touch my shoulder and my body tingles with an electricity I've never felt before.
You look deep into my eyes and I can see the tender love the two of us now share.
You softly whisper my name and my heart fills with the joy of knowing you are mine.
© 1982 TDD

Essay On Love

I wrote this for an English comp class in college.

Love is like a beautiful spring day, filling your entire being with a quiet, peaceful feeling of joy and contentment. Love can be like the fleeting excitement of fireworks exploding in brilliant colors against a darkened sky or the tingling, breathtaking shock of plunging headfirst into the cold water of a sparkling blue lake on a hot August day.

Love is not selfishly expecting another person to change something in his personality just to be the way you feel he should be. Love is not wanting someone who will stay with you twenty-four hours a day, catering to your every whim and need. Love is not holding back the one you love from reaching his full potential simply because you are afraid he will outgrow the relationship you share.

Love is a mother standing watch over her sleeping child who is slowly recovering from an illness. Love is knowing you have found the one special person whom you want to share all your hopes and dreams for the rest of your life. Love is watching a small four year old boy, followed by his even smaller puppy, running through a green grassy field festively adorned with yellow and white daisies. Love is a combination of many emotions and events, something which has no simple definition, but which touches each life in some way, and which must be experienced to be truly understood.


Missing you

Missing you
More than words can say.
Needing you
Beside me every day.
Wanting you
To take my doubts away.
© 1982 TDD

Happy Valentine's Day

When I gaze into your eyes
That lonely feeling in me dies.
I long to be held in your arms
And let you shelter me from harm.
I know I'll never another who
Could mean as much to me as you,
So even though the going's been rough
I know our love is strong enough
To see us through a lot more years.
We started out as two close friends
And built a love with no visible end.
There's so much I want to say,
But I can wrap it up this simple way:
My darling, Happy Valentine's Day!
© 1982 TDD

The Tree

The Tree
Tall and menacing
Against the darkened sky--
A symbol of loneliness
And the tears we cry.
Giving an appearance of strength--
Withstanding any storm--
And seeming so all alone,
With no way of getting warm.
Yet in the spring it stands
As a symbol of life,
Greenness flashing in the sun,
Helping to relieve our strife.
It shows us the secret of life
Is knowing how to adapt
When, in the course of our lives,
We veer off the way we had mapped.
© 1981 TDD


Home at last!
Lying in your arms, feeling the soft, warm strength of your body pressed to mine,
I know this is where I belong.
Nowhere else can I feel so much like a woman--
Nowhere else can I feel so free to be myself.
I could spend my life wrapped in your arms,
Feeling your tenderness come through in each touch.
© 1981 TDD

Story Poem #5

Thinking love knew no obstacle,
She had plunged into an affair with him,
Disregarding the fact he was still a child.
For a while, things ran smoothly in their lives
And she was sure her friends had been wrong--
Love didn't care how old (or young) you were.
Soon she found the little things that never used to bother her
Were grating on her nerves, making him nearly impossible to be around.
One day she screamed at him to act his age,
Then stood staring at him silently
As she realized he was.
© 1981 TDD

My Sunshine

My world seems so different without you;
A lonely place with no sunshine or smiles.
It's dark, and I feel no one cares for me--
I could wither up and die, and no one would notice.
Suddenly I see you walking toward me.
In that instant, the clouds roll away
And my entire world is brightened.
You have become the sunshine of my life.
© 1980 TDD


Lately, I've heard people talking
About a beautiful place called Xanadu,
Where people's dreams come true.
Now, all I want to know is this--
Where is Xanadu for you and me?
I see it every night as I lay dreaming,
Then it disappears like a shooting star.
Could it be waiting somewhere,
Nurtured by love and hope,
Until the moment is right?
Until the world believes--
Until we believe--
And we feel free to live out a fantasy?
Tonight I feel Xanadu growing near,
Wherever it may be,
And I watch expectantly
For you to feel the presence, too,
Knowing all the while,
In spite of my dreams,
You search elsewhere
For a Xanadu of your own.
© 1980 TDD


Sometimes, late at night,
I'll wake from a dream
Filled with you and,
Somewhere among the
Fantasy and reality,
Reach out to touch...
Only an empty pillow
Where no head lies.
© 1980 TDD


That day, as I sat all alone,
Sure love would never come,
You breezed into my life
Bringing beauty as surely
As the first spring flowers.
Then you smiled
And my whole world
Was aglow with the light.
I knew I'd found my love at last,
And everything would be alright.
© 1980 TDD

Story Poem #4

The young woman looks through the glass
At the newborn babies in the hospital nursery
And begins crying softly.
Once she had envisioned a different scene--
Shared in joy and love--
Taking place here, but that could never be.
Staring absently at her diamond ring,
She thinks of the letter that arrived this morning.
The letter said her fiance was gone--
A war hero, they called him,
But to her it all seemed senseless murder.
How could it possibly be true
When he'd only been away for three months?
She didn't even know if her last letter
Could have reached him in time--in time
For him to die knowing
He would have a child in six months.
© 1980 TDD


Sitting on the riverbank,
Lost in my memories,
I suddenly begin to dream of you.
Why do you continue to haunt me
When I know we can never be?
Your love is all for another
While you and I seem always to fight
Over things of no real significance.
Knowing this, you would think that I,
Even in a hazy, romantic fog,
Would forget you, or at least try.
No, I'll never forget you, my darling,
And I can't bring myself to even try.
No other man could ever take your place
In the center of my heart and life.
I will love you through all eternity.
© 1980 TDD

My Waiting Heart

My Waiting Heart
My heart lies waiting in your hands
As I wonder what you'll do.
Will you see the need
Pulsing through each beat
And nurture it with your love?
Or will you ignore my feelings,
Cut into my fragile heart,
Leaving it bleeding and in pain?
© 1980 TDD

Which Way Do I Turn?

Which Way Do I Turn?
Torn between saying "goodbye" or "I love you,"
I don't know where to turn.
You and I are so different in the way we look at life--
You are a realist, "destined" to be rich,
And I'm the romantic, yearning for your touch.
Whenever we're together, it all seems to fit,
Making me believe our two worlds can become one.
Yet, on my own, sometimes it gets me down
As I wonder if it's really worth the time and pain.
Then, as I weigh the pros and cons,
I have a revelation.
Even if you don't bring me candy and flowers,
You're always there when I call,
And you show me that you care.
© 1980 TDD

Story Poem #3

One in a world made for couples,
She always feels so out of place.
What can she do, where can she go,
When there's no one else she wants to be with--
No one really worth the effort?
Once she, too, was part of a duo.
For a long time, the two of them had everything;
There were walks in the moonlight,
Walks in the rain,
Long talks sharing their hopes and dreams,
And everything else the world expects of romance.
But what the world never counts on, it seems,
Is one of the pair finding someone else
They would rather be a twosome with instead.
When he came to her and asked to be set free
(Even though they had no strings),
She was so numb she had no answer for him.
Taking that for consent, he became engaged,
Leaving her to watch them in their happiness.
When they were married, she was there,
Tears in her eyes, to wish them luck.
Yet, as she hugged and kissed him one last time,
She couldn't help remembering the times
When she'd dreamed of this moment for them,
Never knowing how things would change.
Now, sometimes at night when she's lonely,
She thinks of him and says
"Wherever you are, darling, you know
You're the one I'll always love."
Then she holds her near
And cries herself to sleep;
One in a world made for couples.
© 1980 TDD

Story Poem #2

When the phone rings, she prays it will be him.
It is, and he says he can get away,
But only for a few hours. Will she see him?
She knows it isn't right,
But she has to see him, to be with him,
So he comes.
As they sit sipping white wine,
She keeps thinking of his wife.
Does she know what's happening--
That he's using both of them?
It all seems so unfair somehow.
Before he was married, she was his only love,
Then he saw that a marriage could help him get ahead
And he was wed, keeping her on the side.
Every now and then, the thought passes through her mind
That true love shouldn't happen this way,
But it goes away when he holds her and says
"Sweetheart, I love you so."
Yet it soon got harder to live
On all his empty promises.
One day she realized that,
Instead of leaving his wife to be with her,
He was falling in love with his wife
And letting her down easy.
Now she sits at home alone each night,
Knowing how his wife must have felt
Way back when.
© 1980 TDD

Monday, May 4, 2009

Story Poem #1

All by herself in that big lonely mansion
She sits by the fire, waiting for him--
Reads a good book, cheats at solitaire,
Takes another drink, still waiting for him.
Then she starts to wonder what went wrong.
What happened to the life she dreamed of having?
He was a young, handsome, hardworking doctor
And she was always the light of his life.
Yet, as he became more familiar with success
He seemed less familiar with his wife and her needs.
The nights he spent at home became fewer
As she realized he was being taken from her.
Not by another woman--she could have dealt with that;
The third side of this triangle was his career.
After too many nights alone in the mansion,
She knew all too well what she had to do,
So she packed her clothes, went back home
And one day married the boy next door.
They shared their love for one another
And, though they never had much money,
She felt richer than ever before.
© 1980 TDD

Music City

More possible song lyrics

Music City
You said you wouldn't go to Music City
Not just to be my part-time girl
Honey, if you'll come to Music City
I swear you'll have my heart, my soul, my world.
When I left you there
I thought I was riding high
Yet each night I sing my songs
With thoughts of you and sighs
I go to my room and try to sleep
But only dream of you
In those dreams our love goes on
When I'm awake, I'm still alone and blue
You said you wouldn't go to Music City
Not just to be my part-time girl
Honey, if you'll come to Music City
I swear you'll have my heart, my soul, my world.
Honey, I know I was wrong to leave
For another I thought I loved
And the pull of that recording studio
I love only you, I swear to God above
She and I are no more; it fell apart
Like you said it would
And, without you standing near me
My songs don't seem as good
You said you wouldn't go to Music City
Not just to be my part-time girl
Honey, if you'll come to Music City
I swear you'll have my heart, my soul, my world.
© 1979 TDD

Your Love

My first possible "song lyrics."

Your Love
Sometimes all the days can seem so long
Sometimes everything I do is wrong
Yet I know that if I call your name
You'll be there just for me
There are so many times I need you to help me see
Loving you has made me feel so beautiful inside
And if my world comes crashing down
You let me run to you and hide
Baby your love has made me feel
Like a woman through and through
And if there is a way
I want to share my life with you
I long to be a part of all the things you do
As a lover and a friend, and I'll never make you blue
Loving you the way I do, I long to make you see
That you alone, you've made a woman out of me
Once I fall in love, I fall in love to stay
And I won't play those games that other people play
I hope forever more you'll go on being mine
With you there to lean on, my days all seem to shine
Baby your love has made me feel
Like a woman through and through
And if there is a way
I want to share my life with you
I long to be a part of all the things you do
As a lover and a friend, and I'll never make you blue
As the years go flying by, our love keeps growing stronger
Our ordinary problems will trouble us no longer
Me loving you, you loving me, with a feeling heaven sent
Before we met, I didn't know what happiness really meant
Now I keep a smile glowing brightly on my face
And I finally put my heartaches back into their place
Baby your love has made me feel
Like a woman through and through
And if there is a way
I want to share my life with you
I long to be a part of all the things you do
As a lover and a friend, and I'll never make you blue
© 1979 TDD

Written For A High School Friend

This was written after I lost a hemophiliac friend to a gunshot wound.

You were born into a world of hurt and pain
And more often than sunshine you felt the rain
The road you walked stretched endlessly on
You kept on going though your strength was nearly gone
Your family and friends tried hard to make you see
That anyone can be whatever they want to be
You didn't realize all you could have done
But still you managed to have lots of fun
Try as you might to touch that elusive cloud
It stayed out of reach, and you cried out loud
Now you've climbed that mountain and you're feeling fine
You can't feel the pain of those left behind.
We remember your laughter, your eyes, your smile
And know we've only parted for a short while
In the lonely hours we will feel you there
And someday that cloud will be ours to share
© 1979 TDD

Suddenly Love

Suddenly Love
Once I stood here all alone
With no place I could call my home
No one to love me, no one to care
I'm not even sure people knew I was there
I drifted along, lived day to day
As far as I knew, there was no other way
Suddenly love was thrust into my life
And I had a longing to become a wife
Never before had I been so secure
In a love that was so true and so pure
You gave a new meaning of life to me
That being in love is the best place to be
Forever and always I will love you
And your love also will be true
The plans we're making every day
Will come to pass as years go their way
We see a house that's clean and bright
Surrounded by a fence that's sparkling white
There's a daughter whose beauty is untold
And a son whose story may soon unfold
Each day will I thank the Lord up above
That you came into my life bringing love
© 1978 TDD

Gather My Love

Gather My Love
Gather my love like so many flowers
Collect the moments till they become hours
Moments, hours, drift into days
Gather my love in so many ways
Smile at me, hold me, kiss my lips
Caress my skin with your fingertips
Love me now as you have from the start
Love me with every beat of your heart
As we stand under the twinkling stars above
Look in my eyes and vow your love
Say you'll always be with me
And our love will everlasting be
On bright summer days with the sun up above
We'll gather up dreams as we gather our love.
© 1978 TDD


All alone I sit and dream of you
I find memories of things we used to do
My mind goes back to those days gone by
When we thought love was for only you and I
Days of love when the sun shone so very bright
And the stars came out for us each night
I cry when I hear a song you used to sing
Because of the memories they can bring
I hear your sweet voice ringing clear
And it's almost as though you're standing near
Sometimes I wonder, as I dream of you
If it could be you think of me, too.
Do you remember the moments we shared?
Do you remember you said you cared?
When we meet it seems a hundred years have passed
Since we two vowed our love would last
Sometimes I cry and sometimes I smile
But still I miss you all the while
Someday we may meet once more
And I will love you like before.
© 1978 TDD

For My Father

This one was written when my folks were close to splitting up, and my father was never around for the family.

And you dare to call it love!
You yell and scream
And run away
Then turn to booze
To ease the pain
And dare to call it love?
Do not say that you love me.
If you can not stay to watch me grow
Then leave us now before it gets out of hand
And what feelings we have turn to hate
But do not say that you love me.
Love is not cruel
It does not intentionally break hearts
Or destroy lives and families
Love is everlasting
Love is kind and considerate
Love is wanting to be together.
And if you don't feel these things
Do not say that you love me!
© 1978 TDD

The Many Sides Of Me

The Many Sides Of Me
If only there was a way for everyone to see
All the people deep inside me, struggling to be free
I live so many lives there in my mind
The one I really want is difficult to find
There's the me who's wife, mother, lover and friend
The me with a singing career, on a tour that never ends
The me who is an actress, playing parts upon the screen
And the me who is a doctor in a hospital neat and clean
Maybe someday the perfect life will fill my mind
And I'll be happy ever after, until the end of time
Until that day, I'll live within my fantasies
Dreaming of all the lives that make up me.
© 1977 TDD